"My name is Chev Chelios and today's the day that I die
I knew it was gonna be good when I walked into a 12:05PM showing and noticed the packed crowd. Yeah, I was a bit worried when the cheesy movie title popped up on the screen, but no worries. Crank is unashamedly violent, unapologetically un-PC, wickedly funny, and yes, a bit cheesy, which in a way, just adds to the unique flavor of the film.
The synopsis: When professional hit man Chev Chelios (Jason Statham), who sometimes works for a big time West Coast mob, purposely botches an assignment and lets the vic get away, he wakes up the next morning in a drugged state, confused and groggy, with a lethargically beating heart. While Chelios was sleeping, small-time scumbag Ricky Verona (Jose Pablo Cantillo) had injected him with a lethal Chinese synthetic drug (called the Beijing Cocktail) which will kill him in one hour. Now, fighting for each further second of life, Chelios must be constantly on the move and must keep his adrenalin pumping or his heart will stop. With nothing to lose and running out of time, the frantic Chev goes on a rampage as he gets his revenge on, prevents his lady love Eve (Amy Smart) from falling into the syndicate's hands, and, against all odds, tries to find an antidote.
The stylish, hyper-kinetic filmmaking is right up the alley of the easily-bored MTV generation (like me). Having said that, I couldn't help but point out that the more than a few elder viewers in the theater were also having a rollicking good time. Directors/writers Mark Neveldine and Brian Taylor apply frenetic camera techniques (dizzying pans, zooms, color washes, camera switches...) to ensure that Crank is a wild rollercoaster experience for the audience. You know how, more often than not, trailers lie to you? Well, Crank more than lived up to the promise of the trailer. The stunts and action sequences are totally banging. I was a bit surprised when Statham didn't use any martial arts moves, relying instead on bone-thudding physicality and gunplay to beat up on the bad guys. I was curious to see how creative the film was gonna be in finding ways to keep Chelios's heartrate elevated, and, man, they came up with some doozies: from snorting coke and nasal spray, ingesting power-ades and pop blasters candies, to resorting to resuscitation paddles and head-banging to "Achy Breaky Heart," to one hilariously outrageous scene in Chinatown in front of aghast and then cheering spectators.
The Italian Job, Cellular, The Transporter series...British ex world-ranked diver Jason Statham is coming hard and fast as the new face of American action cinema. He is intense and no-nonsense, with a certain rugged physicality that makes his he-man roles utterly believable. He's not blessed with Brad Pitt looks (although he is called "Handsome Rob" in The Italian Job); he's more of a regular bloke than anything else, though there's a certain glint in his eyes that would make a guy think twice before effing with him, even when he's clad in a patient's backless hospital garb. And here's the thing that differentiates him from the other action stars - Statham, unlike the Rock and Seagal and Van Damme, has natural acting chops.
And now on to Amy Smart. In my eyes, Amy Smart can do no wrong. Here, she plays Eve, the slightly ditzy, carefree love of Chelios's life and the reason he wanted out of the killing biz. Eve is clueless when it comes to setting the microwave clock, but she is SO smoking hot! Efren Ramirez, on the other hand, is not so smoking hot. Ramirez (Napoleon